Review – DC Universe Infinite Heroes “Crisis” Bizarro

“Lex Luthor wanted his own Man of Steel. Secretly scanning Superman’s molecular structure, he ordered his top scientist, Dr. Teng, to duplicate his foe. However, neither Luthor nor Teng realized that Superman came from another world. Teng was unable to replicate Kryptonian DNA, resulting in an imperfect clone whose body swiftly mutated into a lumbering “Bizarro” menace.”
— from Superman: The Ultimate Guide to the Man of Steel*

So about a year ago I tackled the Justice League Unlimited Bizarro action figure . . . and I wasn’t exactly a fan of the toy (review here). Well, I recently spotted another 3.75-inch scale Bizarro action figure and despite bad experiences with the DC Universe Infinite Heroes series I just had to try again. After all, reports were that Mattel had improved the articulation and design of the figures.

I guess this crappy Bizarro action figure forgot to get in line for the improvements, because his articulation and even his details kinda suck. I don’t know why Mattel can’t seem to create 3.75-inch scale action figures that can compete with Hasbro, but there’s no doubt in my mind that Mattel is second-rate when it comes to creating figures for this scale.

First, the Good

First off, I’ve gotta say that I love the colors used for this Bizarro action figure. In fact, it was the coloring that caught my attention when I spotted this guy at Target. The dark purple and light purple colors of his suit and cape look fantastic together, and if Mattel gets around to creating a DC Universe Classics Bizarro action figure I hope they go with this color scheme. It’s beautiful.

Bizarro’s sculpt is decent — not great, but decent — even though it’s not as exciting or stylized at the Justice League Unlimited design. I don’t have enough experience with this line to know whether or not this is a new sculpt, but based on the terrible articulation I assume this is the same sculpt and design that was used for the Superman figure that was released earlier in the series.

This photo at Action Figure Insider isn’t perfectly clear, but from what I can tell I strongly suspect that the Superman body shown there is what was used for this Bizarro action figure. Which is too bad, because if the newer Infinite Heroes action figures actually are an improvement then using an old body is just a terrible choice (kinda like how Hasbro keeps reusing the too-short Daredevil body in their Marvel Universe series).

Which leads us directly into the bad . . .

Say Hello to Awful Articulation

Bizarro has ball-hinge shoulders, hinged knees and elbows, a twisty waist and head, and t-hips. And that’s it. Where Hasbro gives us 3.75-inch scale action figures with tons of poseability options Mattel gives us these toys that can stand there; if they’re lucky enough that the design doesn’t throw them off balance (Bizarro can stand on his own). Unfortunately, it’s not just the articulation that has problems.

Shoddy Craftsmanship

Bizarro must have been rushed through the assembly line at Mattel’s factory, because his neck isn’t quite properly aligned. The two halves of the torso were glued together a little off-center, giving the figure an ugly seam line on one side of his neck. And the seam issue runs down the torso, though thankfully the cape (which is a cool vinyl piece) hides the seam problem on the figure’s body. I know this is a mass-market toy, but this is one of the worst assembly issues I’ve seen on a 3.75-inch scale action figure and it’s unacceptable from a company of Mattel’s size.

Mattel does some great work (most of the DC Universe Classics figures I own are cool, and every Masters of the Universe Classics action figure I own is awesome), but for reasons I don’t understand that greatness doesn’t extend to these small figures. Sad, since I’d love to get some great DC characters in the same scale as my Marvel Universe collection.

Closing Thoughts

What can I say? Bizarro may not be as bad as the Justice League Unlimited action figure of the character (at least this one can stand on his own), but it’s ridiculously behind the curve for 3.75-inch scale action figures produced in the last few years. What we get with this toy is something of about the quality I expect from cheaper lines and not what a company of Mattel’s size should be selling us.

At $7 this figure is over-priced and if you spot it for $5 it’s still over-priced. What’s really sad is that I’ve seen several Infinite Heroes action figures on clearance for $3/each and that price is still too high for what you get.

If Mattel’s trying to kill their 3.75-inch scale DC Universe Infinite Heroes line then they’re doing a great job. I just hope the poor choices and design of these toys doesn’t bleed over into some of Mattel’s better action figure lines.

Philip Reed feels like an idiot for buying another release in this series. Why can’t he learn?