The Ten G.I. Joe Toys that Would Make Great Halloween Costumes

Halloween and G.I. Joe don’t often go together, but now’s the perfect time for us to examine the ten G.I. Joe toys of the eighties and early nineties that are just dying to become Halloween costumes. For a military/covert action toy series, G.I. Joe had some pretty wacky stuff, and there were times when the series turned outright scary.

Alley Viper (1989)

There must be some weird streets on Cobra Island, because this Alley Viper costume is gonna pop in any other alley in the world. I don’t care, though, because this is easily the greatest-looking Viper costume the madmen behind Cobra ever created. And you will surely be spotted if you construct this costume and wear it out at night. No reflective tape needed on your costume, buddy!

B.A.T. (1986)

Why go out on Halloween night dressed as a mundane robot when you could hit the streets in your own Battle Android Trooper costume? How you pull off the interchangeable hands is your problem, but this would be a great-looking costume; especially if you hit a club where the strobe light can flash off of your menacing helmet.

Bio-Viper (1993)

A monstrous Cobra soldier, this is one spooky action figure. And not only because it’s a monster, but because it was just one of the final nails in the coffin that led to the end of the G.I. Joe line that I loved when I was younger. This is one ugly piece of junk . . . so why is it I suddenly find myself wanting one of these action figures?

Regardless of its value as a toy, this is one creepy critter that would be a challenge for any dedicated costumer to construct. If you pull this one off then you’re sure to win an award or two (and confuse people when you tell them your costume is based on a G.I. Joe toy).

Golobulus (1987)

If you can figure out a way to create that lowerbody snake portion of the design — or maybe you just remain stationary and wear the costume at your house — then the evil Cobra-La Ruler, Golobulus will make a fantastic costume for Halloween night. The Burgess Meredith voice may also be a problem.

Raptor (1987)

Make the ladies swoon, fellas, by showing off your awesome chest while wearing your Raptor costume. You may need to hit the gym today if you’re gonna be ready by next year, but if you have the bod for this costume then you’ll be all set. Well, that is if the ladies ignore the completely ridiculous costume that’s draped across your now-hot body. Cobra sure knew how to hire weirdos.

Sludge Viper (1991)

Not an easy one to construct (not that any of these have been easy costume suggestions), but the Sludge Viper may be a fun design since it’s another one of those costumes that will act as its own light source once you get everything assembled. And, as with some of the other nonsense on this list, you’ll get to spend the entire night explaining to people that your costume is from G.I. Joe. I swear, if you’re not dressed as the classic Baroness (I have nothing against geek girls dressed as the Baroness for Halloween, or daily wear for that matter) then no one gets your G.I. Joe-inspired costume.

S.N.A.K.E. Battle Armor (1983)

This costume will take a hell of a lot of time to construct (I recommend starting today so that it’s ready for Halloween 2015), but if you can pull this off then you’re gonna be awesome at the Halloween party. Massive, powerful, and one of the coolest Cobra toys ever released, the S.N.A.K.E. armor might be the best costume idea on this entire list.

Tomax and Xamot (1985)

So you and your evil twin brother need a costume but you don’t have any ideas? I recommend you put together costumes for Tomax and Xamot, you’re sure to be a couple of awesome dudes in these red, blue, and silver outfits. And if you don’t have a twin then you can always pull this costume off by making sure to always stand next to a mirror on Halloween night.

Toxo-Zombie (1992)

If a Cobra zombie isn’t suitable for Halloween then I don’t know what is. I recommend going with the art on the file card (see below), rather than the toy, since the artwork makes it clear this is a zombie. And if you plan this out over a few years then you can go as a Sludge Viper one year and a Toxo-Zombie the next. After all, they basically look like the same costumes.

Zartan (1984)

You’ve gotta be in pretty good shape to pull off the classic Zartan costume for Halloween. If you’ve got the body for it, though, the rest of the costume should come together pretty easily. Well, except for that holographic projector that Zartan used to change his appearance. That may take a little more work.

And that’s it, ten toys from the old G.I. Joe line that are just dying to become Halloween costumes. Of course it’s too late for this year (unless you’re some sort of costuming genius), but it never hurts to start filing away ideas for next year.

Now you know. And knowing is half the battle.

Note: Mark Bellomo’s Ultimate Guide to G.I. Joe was vital to the creation of this post; browsing through the book one day led me to the conclusion that G.I. Joe had some pretty scary toys in its eighties run, and when better to look at these than during Halloween? And, no less important and coming second only because something has to come second, is www.yojoe.com, the best site for looking at old G.I. Joe toys. Thanks, guys, for such an awesome site!