Review – Sucklord’s Miss Thing

“A Post-op Disaster of the worst kind, Miss thing is on the loose! What started as a standard, Textbook Mad Scientist scheme mutated into some thing . . . More! Miss thing was just like any other mindless, mechanical ape brute; Savage, insolent, and ignorant.”
— from the back of the card

Immediately after opening up the Secret Cinnamon Squad’s Argus 3000 (reviewed here), I started thinking again about the Sucklord’s bootleg resin toys and decided that it was time I tried one out. After all, I enjoyed the Argus 3000 so much that I owed it to myself to take a close look at a piece from the man who (as far as I know) started the bootleg resin action figure/art toy movement. Let’s take a look at what showed up in my mail box.

That’s A Yellow Card

Miss Thing came on a yellow card, packed inside a clear blister that was taped to the card. Using a knife, some patience, and a couple of moments of swearing I managed to remove her from the card without causing any damage to the card. After all, the card itself is a weird piece of art and it’s gonna look great in the display case along with the toys.

The card front — and plastic shell — were splashed with a little orange paint, giving the piece just a touch of orange on top of the blinding yellow. The artwork, Photoshop-manipulated artwork from the 40s or 50s, almost looks like the included action figure. It’s close enough to be forgivable, but I would have liked to have seen Iron Man’s chest used for the card artwork since that would have been a lot closer to the toy’s actual design.

A Resin Rock

Hand-cast resin, with the head and hair cast as separate pieces (I know, because I dropped my Miss Thing and had to glue her head and hair back on), Miss Thing has no articulation at all. She doesn’t even stand there, since her balance is nonexistant and no matter how hard I try she will not stand. She can lean against something, but she’s not gonna stand on her own. I guess that since most people do not open the packaging — I’m weird — standing isn’t really important. And I can deal with the fact that she can’t stand, but it is annoying since it seriously affects how I can display her in my collection.

Miss Thing, as a bootleg toy, is made up of a number of different action figure parts that have been chopped up and reassembled into something funky and cool. Her torso appears to be from an Iron Man action figure (though I couldn’t tell you which one), but I honestly have no idea where her other parts came from. The fuzzy-bottomed pants, especially, stump me, since they look so distinctive that I’m probably gonna slap my forehead as soon as I learn where they’re from. Her head is from a male action figure but, again, I couldn’t tell you which one. Has anyone out there managed to track down the source figure for each of her parts?

Paint and Quality

Miss Thing’s a bit ragged, with some rough parts and a shimmery, almost glittery paint job that is a bit bronze in color. And after the way her head and hair fell off when I dropped her, I’m thinking that it’s possible that her arms were also cast as separate pieces and then glued on; but I’m not curious enough about the manufacturing process to try snapping the arms off.

Is it a toy?

Maybe. I’m finally starting to understand the idea of resin toys, but I have to say that since Miss Thing cannot stand, and was almost certainly never meant to leave his package, I’m leaning more toward “underground art” when thinking of her than I am toy. I’m glad that the Sucklord has had so much success with these bootleg toys, but after seeing one of his pieces and comparing it to the one Secret Cinnamon Squad piece that I picked up, I have to say I prefer the work of the Secret Cinnamon Squad. Both are most certainly art, but it feels like more effort was put into the Secret Cinnamon Squad design; plus, I just like the look of the Argus 3000 a lot more than I do Miss Thing’s appearance.

Closing Thoughts

I’m glad that I bought Miss Thing, since it gave me a chance to take a close look at one of Sucklord’s pieces — something I should have done long ago — but I can say that any future Sucklord pieces I spot will have to look amazing for me to order one. Fortunately, in looking over the bootleg section of the Sucklord’s site I can see that he’s released several figures that look a lot cooler than Miss Thing does.

I hope to get my hands on more of his work, especially a Proto Villain or The Creature figure. Hopefully he’s release some more of those in a carded variant. I can rip a plastic bag just as easily as I can remove a plastic shell from a card back.

Philip Reed now regrets not grabbing Sucklord figures when he first learned about them a few years ago. Goofy, weird, and fun, these are okay toys and great pieces of art.